Froggyland, let’s talk about something serious for a bit.
Chad Mullins makes me hate him.
Now slow down before you jump to the conclusion that I’m being unreasonable. That’s not the case. Continue reading, and I think you will agree that my thought process is justified and valid. I will clearly explain the three main reasons I feel this way.
For those of you who aren’t familiar with Chad Mullins, I’ll give you some background information. Chad is a musician who lives with his family in Murray. He was the winner of the first round of the Texaco Country Showdown, held earlier this year during FreedomFest. He moved on to compete in the Kentucky State Finals and won that competition as well. This weekend, Chad will represent Froggyland in the Southeast Regional Round in Shreveport, LA.
I met Chad earlier this year and worked with him on two of our Lovett Live Concert Series dates. This is where the trouble began and when Chad Mullins made me hate him.
Reason #1: Chad plays the banjo.
Before I explain this, let me start with a few banjo jokes:
Q: What’s the difference between a banjo and a trampoline?
A: You take off your shoes before jumping on a trampoline.
Q: How can you tell if a concert stage is level?
A: The banjo player has drool running out of BOTH sides of his mouth.
Banjo players are the butt of a lot of jokes among musicians. At the end of the day, the banjo is a really difficult instrument to play well. Chad Mullins plays the banjo very well, which means Chad is a VERY TALENTED MUSICIAN.
I have played guitar for about 20 years. I have played just long enough and know enough about playing music to realize that, after all that time, I’m still horrible. Watching a musician like Chad play makes that little green monster crawl up on my shoulder and start whispering in my ear.
And for the record, he doesn’t have to add insult to injury by making it look easy. Are you starting to see how Chad brought this on himself?
Reason #2: Chad is a great songwriter and has an amazing voice.
I tried writing a country song once. The end result can only be described as what would happen if Dr. Seuss and Billy Ray Cyrus were genetically spliced. Just visualize the Whos down in Whoville, line dancing around a keg of Who-Shine while The Grinch sings a song about the woman who broke his heart. Got a mental picture?
I wrote that… and sang it.
Chad Mullins, on the other hand, has skills. I’m not even going to try and describe his talent because I will only hate him more. Watch this video, but keep an eye out for the little green monster:
I’m comfortable enough in my manhood to say that Chad Mullins is a good looking guy. Before I met him, some of my female co-workers had actually described him as “tasty” and compared him to “sizzling fajitas”. While I found it odd that they would describe him with adjectives normally reserved for The Food Network, the implications didn’t sink in until I met him.
Let me break the news to the guys reading this blog. I don’t care who you are, if you are in a room with Chad Mullins, you will be invisible. It doesn’t matter if it’s your spouse, girlfriend, neighbor or your 94 year old Aunt Francis, you will not be able to divert their attention. They will look be looking at Chad Mullins.
Chad has destroyed the grading curve and it makes my little green monster hate him.
In case you haven’t caught on, I’m obviously joking about hating Chad. To be completely honest, you can’t hate the guy. In addition to everything he brings to the table as an artist, Chad Mullins is one of the nicest people I have ever met (and obviously has a sense of humor for letting me rake him over the coals). There is no doubt, Chad deserves every bit of success that comes his way.
Join me in wishing Chad the best of luck this weekend in the Texaco Country Showdown. Regardless of the result, there is no doubt that he has what it takes to be a big star and Froggyland has every reason to be proud of our hometown favorite.
Check out Chad’s profile at The Texaco Country Showdown site here: